Plans Changed

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Life doesn’t usually play out in the same way that we would write our own story.

This time of year, as students are heading back to school, I’ve noticed a trend in parents and even teachers asking the kids what they want to be when they grow up. I enjoy the variety of responses. Typically the kids have no awareness of whether or not the occupation or path is something that will actually fit into their personalities or skill sets. They are simply sharing a dream. Planning and thinking about what could be.

I remember doing this kind of dreaming when I was a kid. I knew that I was going to be a wife and mother. I believed that I was going to be either a ballerina, which eventually evolved to a lawyer. My plan was to have four perfect children – two boys and two girls. My future would most likely include my beautiful red Porsche 911. Life would be good. Life would be full of love and free of trouble.

If I live into my 80’s, my life is halfway over. My life has not resembled my dreams very well. I have felt the pain of abandonment. I have experienced the grief that comes from losing loved ones until heaven’s reunion. I have lost jobs that I loved, and been given jobs that I can’t stand. Even though I love my children, they are not perfect – and are not even all biologically mine. I have felt alone. I have been rejected. I have been hurt. Slandered. Misunderstood. Passed over. Basically, life hasn’t actually looked very little like I thought it would.

I’m pretty sure that my experience is not all that unique. While life may have taken some tough turns, it has also held some pretty incredible blessings. Sometimes, sadly, I have missed them. I’ve been so caught up in myself- my hurts, or my situation, that I miss God’s handiwork. I miss the blessing.

There are times, however, when my focus is right where it should be. I hear God speaking to me through His word. I see God showing me His care and kindness for me. I experience God’s provision. I am aware of His nearness.

What changed? What’s different?  My focus. My heart. When I look for God to be in the midst of my crisis – when I am determined to find Him even when life is going sideways or the bottom is falling out – I will see Him. I may not understand Him… but I see Him. Feel Him.

Jeremiah 29:12-14  “Then you will call upon Me and come and pray to Me, and I will listen to you. You will seek Me and find Me when you search for Me with all your heart. I will be found by you, declares the LORD, and I will restore you…”

God wants us to stay connected and focused on Him. In the good times of life and in the bad, God promises that when we seek Him – when we come to Him and pray to Him (speak to Him) – not only will we find Him, we will be restored by Him.

Life hurts. It stings. It wounds. But God is in the restoration business. He will not leave or forsake you. He loves you too much.

Blessings!